Friday, October 28, 2011

My final words.

To the livers of the world:

Just for the record I didn't mean "livers" as in the body part, I meant the "livers" as in
"the people who live in".

Glad we cleared that up.

This is my life story, for you who is reading this. Hmm... perhaps I should make my writing more


But no. Not like that.

My life started when I was conceived, as did my trouble.
As a fetus I was always in my mother's womb.

I don't remember being in the womb so I'll leave that part out.

When I was six years old I had a lisp.

When I turned seven I still had a lisp.

I decided not to talk anymore when I turned eight, so I'll leave that part out too.

In my early twenties I met the love of my life, Polly. Sure, being in love with a parrot is not an easy life, but I chose to live it.

Polly ate, slept, repeated everything and pooped.

..I soon got a divorce. Polly wasn't my true love, after all.

Soon after THAT heartbreak, Mary-Etta-Jane-Anne came into my sad life.

She also soon left. And that I was happy for because M.E.J.A was...well...stupid.

At least Polly could poop in one spot.

After lonely sad seconds of waiting, I fell in love again. This time to a woman named Bob.

I'll admit, Bob had a few manly features, but she assured me she was a woman.

I married her in a week.

Bob soon gave birth to seven and a half children.

The half was part parrot.

We named them

Bob Jr



Bob Jr Jr



and Jimmy.

I'm almost at the end of my scroll, so I'll finish quickly.

I'm old, therefore dying. Life sucks.


Bob and I stayed married until our deaths. Which is like, in a minute.

Our kids changed their names (who knows why) and Jimmy works in a circus. Life is good. And sucky too, I guess.

Well, I'm still not

Talk to you later!

(For the record I wrote that for Linda 'cause she found a scroll and wanted me to write something on it. Cool, eh?)